15 October 2004

Youthful indiscretion(s) and midlife consequences.

My high school was bearable due to the fact that it didn't have a lot of cliques. This was primarily the case because most everyone at the time was buzzed out of their minds on weed. Details on whether or not someone has the most fashionable clothes or drives the nicest ride are lost when you can't remember your own name. Added to the fact that all this took place at the end of Disco Era, it all combined to demonstrate that for brief snatches of time, "we all really can get along." (But we did have to party in the car beforehand--just to mellow out a little).

One of my classmates (who should go nameless, but everybody already knows him) had what began as a small gathering in his parents home, while they were out of town, of course. I remember sitting on the couch in the living room, in the dark, with only the faint glow from the fluorescent light of the kitchen as backlight. With me were two or three others (of course, I can't remember who), and we were having this deep-yet-meaningless conversation about something or other, when this kid comes crashing through the front screen door glass, head first. He didn't seem to bleed much. I do remember him dusting himself off in time to go back outdoors to finish fighting. At the time, I didn't know who's house I was at, but that wouldn't be the first, nor would it be the last time that would happen.

I attended the senior awards banquet, largely forgetting who was awarded what. My prime motivation for attending was a free meal. I do recall friends getting awards, but the only one that remains clear was the award for "Senior Boy With the Most Children," and "Senior Boy with the Most Children by the Most Girls." This honour was bestowed by the athletic department, with various team members compiling the stats. And as virility would have it, the same guy won both awards.

Aside from making it sound like I graduated from the most drug-infested, out-of-control, ghettofied high shool in the world, I mention these stories because of my 25th year high school reunion, which was held this past summer. Although I've kept in touch with several of my former schoolmates (whether they be in or out of correctional facilities, 12-step programs, and the like), I elected not to return and attend. It's nice to know that those who organized the event were kind enough to tape the obligatory "class picnic," and have posted it online for the entire world to see and no doubt, laugh at hysterically. One of the men in the video just happens to be the same guy who threw the party, and impregnated so much of the female student body (present company excluded). See if you can guess which one it is!

It's a miracle any of us can remember anyone else, all considered...

- D.

P.S. No prizes will be awarded to those who guess correctly. So don't get too worked up or anything.

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