29 December 2006

This is the best website ever...period!

Happy New Year!Recycling at its strangest

This is without a doubt one of the most bizarre craft sites I've ever seen. Coming from me, that has GOT to count for something. Naturally, I felt the need to share it with you. Make sure you check this out--it's so worth it.

(Thanks to my friend Susan for sharing this with me. She wants to make the gun. I guess her PMS is worse than mine...who knew?)

19 December 2006

Merci mille fois, Shelley!

I love imports!
See all the great loot I got from my Stitch Marker Swap partner Shelley? It's all wonderful, and I've already started using my goodies. Read all about Shelley's Country Variety Life, just outside Edmonton.

I love socks!
I finished another pair of socks, as you can see from my expert modelling above. The were made using Tara's Kona Superwash Merino in Goblin Elbow Blue. I had planned to give them to my Close, Personal, and Special Friend E., but they came out so nice, I think I'll keep them for myself. What's more, he's going to spend the holidays in Trinidad (and I don't mean Colorado...), so he'll have no need for socks until after the first of the year...right? (Besides, I've already knitted up another pair with his name on 'em, so to speak, so it's all good).
This, I can't even make up.
I'll close now with more bizarre photos of cute little animals. Click on the pics to see the site where it all originates...

10 December 2006

Some of what you missed during Sunday's Montreal Knit Thang...

For Melanie: Click Here
(then click on the picture)

For the hell of it:

In addition, we discussed my overhanging epiglottis and tilted cervix, escaped mental patients from the Allen, why math sucks, cold goop used during an ultrasound, and places David Bowie has slept during his visits to Montréal. Then I talked about my felting frenzy, hopefully to be completed prior to Christmas (at this point, even Orthodox would be good). Surf over to Ms. Jennifer Tallapaneni's Pie Knits, and check out her pattern "Stella". (It's one my latest numerous UFOs).

06 December 2006

Stick this in your ear.

Click on the pretty picture and let it take you to a place that will blow your mind.

It's where I been hanging until Taylor's official CD is released, hopefully December 15.

And yes, I've been doing some knitting, as well--although ma vie sportif hasn't been going particualrly well lately. I made the error of attempting to knit during the Habs/Maple Leafs game during Saturday last's Hockey Night In Canada. Stitches were dropped, dpns were flung, and my nerves were shot. Big ups to Saku Koivu (not Koigu) for making the victory happen.

I have other photos, largely of seasonal UFOs, but I'm not hyped to post them right now. Keep checking back to see if I get over it.
Here's your Weird Animal Picture. Enjoy!

04 December 2006

I will so not do this, Sam I. Am!!

Let's begin with this, shall we?

Click here for even more highly inappropriate humor.

But wait...there's more!!

These are must reads--especially if you're a fan of the late, great, Dr. S.

Currently, I'm swamped with Seasonal Gift Knitting, and feel ever-so-grateful that any number of recipients know I'm late for absolutely everything, and may not get their stuff until post Orthodox Christmas. (It's the thought that counts, you understand)...

My medication is taking effect, so I'm going to turn in now. Stay tuned for more madness.

21 November 2006

I'm Not In Recovery.

¡Ay Papi!
You scored 83%.

Yes. You are addicted; you are a compulsive over knitter.
Your stash and projects are the envy of many other knitters, but family members may be a bit tired of being asked their opinion about stitch patterns.

Evaluate your own situation: Click Here

In honor of all the knitters I know who have a bun in the oven, the photo of the penguins is dedicated especially to y'all. The best part is that the baby is peeking out of the daddy's pouch. (Why can't somebody make one of those for human fathers?)

Maybe I'll felt one up. (Get it? I made a funny!)

12 November 2006

Geeked. To the utmost.

That's all I can say. For the first time in like--weeks, I'm speechless. You see, I've experienced so very much recently, it's blowing my mind. Truly. See, I travelled, I got extremely queasy, I survived, I endured--and through it all, I knitted.

But wait...there's more!

I've had any number of brushes with greatness, of various kinds--so I haven't a clue where to begin (not that it's ever stopped me). So I'll just post in my usual freewheeling, rambling style...

First of all, Big-Enormous-HUGE-Ups to Minnie and Judith for contributing to Montreal Knits/CBC Montreal Radio Noon's Knit-Along for Dans La Rue. The squares received were lovingly assembled into some of the most fabulous blankets ever, (and in the case of Yours Truly, are still being assembled--but I never was one for speed). Ladies, should you wish to have your 15-minutes of fame, take pride in the fact that your notoriety will last much longer, and reach throughout the Universe (perhaps even the Cosmos) by way of this link to the CBC Radio Noon Website. Omaha gets an honorable mention, even if I damn near lost-my-effing-mind trying to get outta there. Many thanks to you for your contributions!
Kate & Mini-She (aka Tadpole)
Thursday evening, during one of Montreal Knit's Plateau Knitting Thangs, Chez Caféo, I got to meet even more knitters who came on board during my exile in The Land of Corn, and kick back with those whom I knew, but had lots of catching up to do. Kate (I-Design-Lots-Of-Cool-Shit-Not-Just-Clapotis) Gilbert brought Miss Tadpole along, so I got to hold her while discussing world events, hair care products, and her very cool toys. She has no fear, that one. Such a brave, strong girl! I'm so impressed--but it reminds me that I'm not mother material (unless the babies are covered with fur and eat their own poop). You know, guinea pigs. Anything higher maintenance than that would surely merit a visit from CPS. However, a magnificent time was had by all, even if Kate posted this horrid picture of me on her blog, which makes me look as grossly out-of-shape as I actually am. (Damn!) But then again, I'm all about free publicity, so maybe I can Photo Shop it out eventually...or not.
Jennifer (with the coolest sock ever) and Robyn (and her Unborn Future Knitter).
While it's true that I missed Rhinebeck, Friday last made up for it. I got to experience laughter, cameraderie, and a killer club sandwich courtesy of Mme. Yarn Harlot herself--Ms. Stephanie Pearl-McPhee, a whole mess o' Montreal Knitters, and Hurley's Irish Pub (in that order). It started with La Harlot's appearance at the McGill Bookstore, thanks to the People's Liberated Knitting Front of McGill University. She's a very entertaining speaker, who loves that you knit during her talk. In fact, she is exactly as you'd expect her to be after reading any of her books. Plus, she's like that after spending the evening with a bunch of starving/thirsty knitters who've had a few Guinnesses. (It was like we got an extra--yet not, because she's very real and truly down-to-earth). She waxes humourously about so many different elements of modern life, aside from knitting! It was just...you know, fun. Plus, she was kind enough to pose in a picture with me, and agreed to flash signs. Problem is, she noted that I look goofy as hell in the shot. She's right, I do. But I really believe the photo shows the true essence of our respective personalities...

Which is why I am not about to post it here. That, and I'm vain as hell. If you want to see it, e-mail me directly, and I'll consider sending you a copy. But only after you've signed the release. I can't have a messy Vanessa Williams-esque surprise pop out of the woodwork once the world recognizes me for the Shining Star I Truly Am (an' shit...)
Kadi is way more photogenic than I am. Damn her!!!
Meanwhile, I continue on my sock-knitting binge, as I attempt to mix in some Christmas gift projects. It's kind of tricky, because I basically live to procrastinate. You see, I'm blissfully non-goal oriented, unless you consider not setting goals to be a priority. This whole 'deadline thang' reminds me of my time at University (and all prior years of education) in which I put off absolutely everything possible until the very last fucking minute. Like when you have to get started on an extra-long, ultra-important paper, worth 216% of your grade, but oddly enough, the need to mop the kitchen floor simply can't be stifled. Sometimes, I'd make phone calls to people I didn't really want to talk to, (all in the name of putting off the inevitable). While I'm not inspired to take it to that degree, knitting that which should be knitted isn't something I'm hyped to do, right about now. But in a couple of weeks, no doubt I'll be frantic, and ready to get to the impossible. Because hey. That's how I roll. You feel me?

Guess I should stop typing the longest post I've made in the entire three years of this very blog, and get back to the knitting, before I put even my own ass to sleep. (Don't laugh. It's happened. Fo' real).

Now here's the weird animal photo that you've all come to expect.

27 October 2006

A Visually-Intensive Update (of sorts).

Here's what's been going on since my last post...
An experiment with cabling in Silk Garden

Another thong sock

Mass purchases of Tara's Superwash Merino

A pair of socks made from Tara's Superwash

New Red Chuck Taylor Hi-Tops

The obligatory seasonally appropriate Weird AnimalShot

Hallowe'en--it's what's crackin'
(courtesy of my Cousin Elaine in Denver)

Stay tuned...more news to come...soon!

16 October 2006

Who knew? (Part II)

Personally, I was hoping it would reveal why I like to post completely ridiculous pictures like this:

Perhaps there is no answer.

11 October 2006

Sock it to me-sock it to me-sock it to me-sock it to me...

With sincere apologies to Judy Carne, I submit for your review, some of the many socks I'm currently working on. My exile in Omaha has worked my nerves to the point that I've purchased one of those mega-magnification lamps and have gone completely buck wild. I'm all up into the whole sick sock thang. Meanwhile, I'm working on the obligatory Christmas scarves and oddly-shaped hats for felting purposes, as well.

In addition, I managed to get myself on TV with one of the many (many) SnBs I attend on an irregular basis; although with me, I figure the irregularity is implied, doncha think? Personally, I find the best shot is the one of my hands. You see, I had the foresight to do my nails in advance, and even chatted up the photog (because they never get any love, unlike the egotistical Ted Baxter-esque reporters)...

Nevertheless, I plan to continue my attempts to Escape from Omaha. And to all the Knittas in da MTL, I hope to see you again, very very (very) soon. I hope. I hope, a lot.

02 October 2006

Global knitting for the greater good.

This is proof that I don't merely knit--I manage to star trip at the same time. Read about the very first SnB group I dared to join, and their plan to keep street kids in Montreal warm(-er).

Then, you can read about the organization Dans La Rue,
founded by Father Emmett Johns, aka 'Pops'.

But don't hate me because I'm well-connected...
Everyone reading this blog is welcome to send in a square!
(This means you).

In the event you don't understand the intricacies of mailing small-hand knitted items to Canada, please leave a comment with your e-mail addy, and I'll respond accordingly. Because it's laid out like that. Can ya dig it?

...I knew that you could.

- D.

29 September 2006

The Reset (le 29 septembre, 2006)

Yeah Tara!
(Check out her other site, too)

I made this one myself, for less than $40.
(That's $35 if you consider that I bought the wrong wood the first two times--plus I'm talking Canadian dollars!)

(XXXtra Nasty--You've Been Warned!)

Oddly enough, this one is clean...


23 September 2006

Too tired to type

...therefore, this visual will have to do.
Make sure you read the message from the fortune cookie.
It's very deep.

13 September 2006


Now that's just plain nasty.

This is what happens when you go to a buffet after having starved yourself all effing weekend so you can maximize your input. (Actually it's a python who got piggy with it and devoured a pregnant ewe, which is disturbingly similar).

Hey look, I actually completed two!

When I'm not sublimating with mass-quantities of foodstuffs, I'm overindulging by purchasing far too much sock yarn. Please note one completed project (above) and another one which is in progress (below),using Trekking XXL and the Hedera sock pattern from Knitty. I like how the pattern looks more difficult than it is, and how quickly it knits up. (The quasi-camo Aqualrel No. 155 colorway is nice, as well). I thank you in advance for not making rude comments about my bony ankles.

Socks are like...the new dishrags.

When I feel like it, I'll update you on the many other goings-on in my world. Right now, my sinuses are megapissed at me, and are making my life very painful indeed. So this will simply have to do...


03 September 2006

Ghetto-style knitting implements, holiday junkets, and carnal desires.

Who knew Nasacort caps could be so functional?
You know that think about necessity being the mother of invention? That's wrong. Poverty is. And here's my proof--I created these functional little point protectors from the caps on the countless bottles of Nasacort I've been snorting all fucking summer. With a small wad of Fun-tak (represented by the little white ball in the photo) to keep everything in place, I've created cheap and environmentally-friendly knitting gadgets, although they probably have some of my DNA from snot residue, but I like to think it's just me, The Artiste, putting a bit of myself into my work.
This one was made from the prong protector thingy of my new scanner.

"I wants me some of that."
So here's the deal. I'm still trying to escape from Omaha, but it seems that I can only get as far as Denver, for the time being. Yes, I realize that it takes me even further away from Montreal than I already am, but I'm only going there so I can do the groupie thing around Taylor, and perhaps convince him to run off with me to Lachine, where we will live happily ever after. Wish me luck.

More when I return, which hopefully will be Wednesday evening, but most likely will drag into Thursday morning, because air travel is laid out like that, these days...

01 September 2006

...It's Bob!

She mixes and pours martinis without using her hands. Or feet.

I think she should make an appearance at Minnie and Mark's reception. And guess what? Ms. Violet of Lime & Violet fame knows her personally. And so does Mr. Violet. How cool is that??

Well hey...I think it's damn cool. And if you know what's good for you, you will too!

24 August 2006

What will they think of next?!

Or "How To Smuggle A Beverage Onto A Commercial Flight
Then Avoid Those Pesky Lineups At The Loo."

23 August 2006

I actually finished something.

...And here it is. I used the pattern from Spun Magazine. The author is Kate Atherley, and the yarn is Brown Sheep Wildfoote in the colorway Rock 'n Roll. Believe it or not, I'm 2/3rds of the way finished with the left foot, which isn't really like me, but perhaps I'll soon put it down so I can start something else for purposes of further procrastination.

14 August 2006

Actually, I was 'Doped-Up' Kid.

Arty Kid

Whether you were a drama freak or an emo poet, you definitely were expressive and unique.

You're probably a little less weird these days - but even more talented!