Layering gone horribly wrong.

Damn. Now that's hideous.



But the site it came from is an absolute riot.

Disgusting things that got my attention.

"Carroll Puzzled Over Flesh Found In Water System"
This is just plain gross.

"Man Says He Bit Into Flesh In Sandwich"
Finger-lickin' bad.

and finally...

"Justin Timberlake's Hose"
Uhhh...no comment.

Kick'em where it hurts (early and often).

If I ever post a link to the world's worst rag (The Omaha Weird-Harold)* they now require registration to read articles at their site. Feel free to use the following:

login: owhregsucks@gmail.com
password: owhregsucks

* They do, however, have the world's hottest sportswriter.

Why so many bags, lately?

Because I felt like it. That's why.

Made from leftover bits of "Lamb's Pride" from the Brown Sheep Company, it employs the Meema's Marsupial Bag & Pouch pattern from the nouveau classic, "Stitch & Bitch" by Debbie Stoller. Only, I didn't make the little pouch, because I have enough stuff hanging off me all day long, for Christ's sake...

Say it loud...I'm multi-colored and proud.

Mother, modelling my most recent poncho creation.

Once again, I used the pattern Villa from the archives of knitty.com. Mother requested something a tad more 'lively' than the green poncho, so I moved ever-so-slightly toward the gaudy end of things.

She's going to kill me for posting this picture of her without any makeup.

Moonlight Mohair Madness

Here is a pic of the poncho/shawl/wrap, etc., I made using the free pattern courtesy of Lion Brand Yarn. I chose Moonlight Mohair in Safari 203, rather than Purple Mountain 206 used in the pattern photo, because I'm difficult that way. Actually, I found this color to be a bit louder than the purplish shades, and after having been subjected to so much beige for the last few months, something gaudy just felt right. It knits up quite fast, with size 13mm needles. (What this really means, is that I have yet to get the stronger progressive lenses I so desperately need). Therefore, I shall continue to knit with bigass needles until said eyewear has been purchased.

Word.

A slot maven, I'm not.

Please forgive me if I've offended those of you who really enjoy wasting time and losing coinage in casinos. (If you're the type who wins a lot, I'm hating all over you right about now, but that's not important now).

The thing is, I have two more bags to felt, and I'm desperately short in quarters. Actually, I'm desperately short of money, but hey--things are tough all over. I'm not at all lucky when it comes to anything that involves gambling (or hell, winning). Therefore, trying to win a stash of quarters so I can finish the bags isn't bloody likely.

Meanwhile, here are some pics so you can get an idea of what said bags might look like...eventually.

N.B.: I really wasn't going for a camo theme on the smaller bag--it just turned out that way. I have been feeling particularly aggressive lately, but not G.I. Jane-ish or anything.One thing's for certain--I'm feeling the green thing very intensely!

Must Corporate=Evil ?

I've been trying to shake the vestiges of these cluster headaches which have been wrecking havoc on my being for several weeks now. Just as I was about to return to health, I go in for my weekly volunteer gig at a not-for-profit agency, and am slammed between the eyes with the news that one my favorite employees (and friends), is, as the expression goes, "no longer working there..."

Suffice it to say, my headaches have returned in full glory, and I'm really getting sick of this whole corporate thang--no matter what their particular profit motive is. Supposedly, her job has been eliminated, etc., etc. Riiiiiiiiiiight. I know what that means. Nudge-nudge, wink-wink, say no more...

I'm too queasy to rant right now, but I"ll get back to this topic later. Meanwhile, I have pills to eat, and pain to ease. (Physical and otherwise).

Pearlie the Piggy & Yet Anotha Felted Bag

Pearl is getting a pedicure tomorrow. If she's good, I'll drive-thru Wendy's and share a salad with her. If she's not, I'll probably do the same thing. Who can resist that furry little face? She's such a sweetie!

The correlation between game & hideousness.

This is just plain wrong, but I have to concur with the Sam Cassell and Larry Bird thing...

Big ups to The Phat Phree site for breaking it down for us all.

Best of all, it qualifies as Can-Con!

You too can make a wallet from duct tape. Courtesy of our friends at 3M.

Plus, it makes a great gift!

Fingercorn.

I just made up a word. See, all this obsessive knitting, combined with my lousy-yet-inventive technique has given me this weird looking bump on the front of my right index finger, just between the first joint and the bottom of my nail. It just sort of sat there for about a month or so, and I wasn't even sure if it wasn't one of those mid-life finger crisis things that I'd imagined, so I didn't mention it to anyone. (Seriously, I was worried that it might be a wart, or something I've prided myself on never having, you know--like lice). But after consulting carefully with a trusted few, it appears to be like a corn on my finger; hence, the word "fingercorn".

I figure if you can have peppercorns, why not fingercorns?

I've tried using those little Dr. Scholl corn and callous removal products, but they're not particularly helpful. Dear Glenda from Touché told me to try Neosporin, while one of the SNB knitters suggested Bag Balm. (This is after all, an agricultural region. If it's good enough for udders, it's good enough for my fingercorn, n'est-çe pas?)

I'll keep you updated on developments as they shrivel up and go away...because anything less would seriously impair my career as a hand model. And we just can't have that.